Climatic Indigestion

EEK! Hibernation is looking better all the time… It’s spitting cats and dogs, outside — And, my poor house is bearing the brunt of atmospheric flatulence.

Remember the ‘ol days — way back when cars had real bumpers… I don’t recall Mother Nature being so mean. Of course, I was a kid and didn’t have modern worries. Now, my house and I try to survive the Holiday Season’s wear ‘n tear by humming Christmas songs, like ‘The Little Plumber Boy’ — ra bum pa pum pum.

Other holiday diversions include the mass consumption of food. I really enjoyed those little pepperoni snacks, until my wife asked, “Honey? What happened to those ‘doggie-treats’ the Jones’ gave us for Fido?”

The weather really is getting on my corpuscles. I’m looking forward to Spring, when the birds are blooming and the flowers are chirping. The warmer weather doesn’t stop my house from complaining. But, at least I can go outside without dressing like ‘NaNook of the North’.

For the time being, my house and I will hunker down. I’ll inspect her damage when things blow over. Meanwhile, we’re barricaded — reinforced with pizza and eggnog.

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